Twas The Night Of The Rapture

Twas the night of the Rapture and all through the house
Not a Christian was staying except the church mouse.
Their Bibles were read without any care
Thinking that Jesus would soon be out there.

The children were drawing Lazarus once dead,
Mindlessly praising Jesus in bed
And Mom off her rocker with brain all in wraps
Was reading her bible while I took a crap.

When out of the East there arose such a clatter,
I sprang to my feet to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash!

When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
Up in the sky I thought Jesus was here!
With a light like the sun sending forth a bright ray,
I knew in a moment this must be THE DAY!'

The voice in my head made me block both my ears,
Was it Jesus returning just like I feared?
I thought I possessed some good mental health,
But imagined weird things in front of myself.

Nude fundamentalists flying up high
Fluttering with Jesus up in the sky
I heard my wife say "Wake up for God's sake!"
It was a dream, I was awake.

In the words of this poem the meaning is clear;
The coming of Jesus ain't drawing so near.
In the coming time after their fall
We'll find that the Fundies weren't true after all!