What Jesus Looks Like - ACTUAL PICTURE!!!!

Rev 01:12-20

Jesus wears a golden girdle (obviously he has a beer-belly)

Jesus has white hair (obviously he's geriatric but at least he isn't bald)

Jesus has firey eyes (obviously he eats too many hot chillies and curries)

Jesus has brass feet (obviously his real feet have been amputated and replaced by brass substitutes)

Jesus has a watery voice (obviously his larynx is damaged)

Jesus has a sharp twoedged sword tongue (obviously he has had cosmetic surgery on his tongue so that he can be a freak in a circus sideshow)