The Promo is "Accept Jesus into your heart and get the free gift of salvation. The End."
When you accept the Promo you get lumbered with the "Sales Add Ons"
- Join the church
- Join Bible Study
- Join Prayer meetings
- Join your "club" ... Men's Meeting or Women's meeting depending on your gender (homosexuals and transgendered Christians not welcome)
- attend all regularly
- listen to the sermoan and obey ... or else
- pray regularly
- read your bible regularly
- pay your tithes
- pay your offerings
- pay your love gifts
- volunteer for unpaid work at the church
- evangelise others
- don't attend other churches, they aren't spiritual like we are
- don't associate with your former friends and family if they are not Trew Kristyuns
- don't participate in art works that are not sanctioned by this church ... bans may be applicable on certain books, films, music, dance ... check with the pastor
- never disagree with your pastor, elders, deacons, or any member of a ministry team ... they are infallible
- vote for conservative Right-wing politicians because the Left is satanic, of the devil, demonic, nonChristian, antiChristian, secular humanist, evilooshunist
- etc etc etc etc
Yawn .......
Welcome to the FUNDAMENTALIST FUNHOUSE!
