What if . . .The rock-and-roll band The Beach Boys had played exclusively fundamentalist Christian rock?
Well, they might have written song lyrics a little something like these . . .
SAVIN' CRUSADE("Surfin' Safari")
Let's go savin' souls, a Christian nation is our goal,
Come on a crusade with me
Early in September we'll be startin' out
Our campus leader's comin' along
We're goin' door to door with our pamphlets and tracts
Gonna show those other faiths that they're wrong
Come on babe, let's make the scene, yeah, I'm gonna take you witnessing
Come on babe, let's make the scene, yeah, I'm gonna take you witnessing
Let's go savin' souls, a Christian nation is our goal,
Come on a crusade with me
It's our divine mission to spread the good news
The commission we've been given's just great
Come join our crusade now, you got nothin' to lose
Unless you accept Jesus too late
Hey there, have you heard of the Four Spiritual Laws?
Is it heaven that you hope to achieve?
Well, now that you know all about the salvation scheme
You're accountable for what you believe
........
TRUE SALVATION("Good Vibrations")
Ah I love the way He rose when He was killed
And the way His blood absolved me of my guilt
I see the truth in His Holy Word
And believe it all *because* it is absurd
I've finally found true salvation
He's given me exculpation
I've finally found true salvation
He's given me exculpation
True, true, true, true salvation
True, true, true, true salvation
I close my mind my faith is firmer now
I know I can't allow myself to doubt
Else I'll burn forevermore
That's why reason is the devil's whore
My, my, my, my, true salvation
John 3:16 says my slate is clean
My, my, my, my, temptation
My, my, my, Christian nation
Gotta spread the Good News that salvation's offered to everyone
Gotta spread the Good News that salvation's offered to everyone
....
WOULDN'T IT BE NICE
Wouldn't it be nice to demonstrate that everything revolved around the Earth?
And we could prove that the Red Sea was parted, and Jesus really had a virgin birth?
You know, that just might keep the skeptics quiet
And the Bible no one would deny it
Wouldn't it be nice if evolution was revealed to be just one big fraud?
Then instead of children learning science, they could spend the time in prayer to God
Then there would not be any quarrels
For we'd all have just one set of morals
Wouldn't it be nice?Maybe if we support the Christian Coalition it might come true
We would rid the U.S.A. of all atheists and Jews
We'd have family values, and no single parents
Wouldn't it be nice?
....
from http://www.infidels.org/misc/humor/beach.html
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